Quote: (01-04-2015 12:45 AM)Feisbook Control Wrote:
In Taiwan, and I am sure it is similar in other countries, the giving of cash at weddings then ties the receiver into attending other people's weddings (and thus, giving money). In my father-in-law's case, he was/is expected to attend the weddings of the children of all of the people he invited to my wedding. Those people will also be obligated to attend the wedding of my wife's younger brother in the future. Indeed, my wife and I are in a similar situation with her former classmates, etc. So, when people say that they make money from their weddings, they don't really. They receive the money in a lump sum and then pay it back periodically (which is an advantage, obviously).
In Taiwan, this is actually accounted for in a ledger. At our wedding, one of my wife's sisters and someone else (an aunt, I think), had the job of sitting at a table at the entrance. Everyone who arrived presented their red envelope (with money) and had their names recorded. The money was counted beneath/behind the desk and recorded beside their names. Likewise, there was also a ledger of people who had helped (including the people collecting the money), and at the end, they were given cash in red envelopes by my wife and me. It's really mercenary in Taiwan. Anyway, the ledger is still around somewhere. My wife was one of the first of her university classmates to get married, but periodically one of them (who might not have spoken to her since then) lets her know that he or she is getting married and my wife (at least) is expected to go. If she can't go, she is still expected to send a red envelope (albeit for a lesser amount, since she wouldn't be eating their food). It is a debt. We didn't really make that money.
Oh for fuck's sake - a bloody ledger !? The cultures I mentioned had nothing of that sort. If you make it like that I would rather pay for the wedding myself - thank you.
Besides - I am not going to get married unless it's a billionairess or I am a billionaire and don't give a shit, so I don't care about any customs anyway.