Quote: (11-12-2014 09:29 AM)heavy Wrote:
You're reading the situation correctly according to your own perceptions of the situation. However, your hard-wired (ie neurons formed at a young age) might be seeing threats where none are present.
This isn't a question us here at the forum could really answer for sure. Even people who grew up in toxic environments respond to situations intuitively, it's just not always a logic response.
I feel hyper sensitivity is usually is a result of a toxic household caused by the dad. It can result from alcoholic or abusive dad (could be mom too). I wouldn't limit it to that though. I know I still struggle with what you're talking about coupled with some insecurities. Mine was simply due to toxic shaming in the name of God (Christianity).
I don't know your situation. For all we know you're reading these situations correctly. I just feel it's beyond the scope of an online forum (yes, even RVF).
^^^^^
I am down with the above. Very perceptive comment. It seems like you're reading negativity into situations where people are neutral. Most people in life aren't judging 24/7 and, in fact, are looking for acceptance themselves.
If you're feeling negative where there probably is none, you'd should try and do something about it. There were countless situations I read as negative when I was younger, but as decades passed I found out the people involved didn't view me negatively at all. I had viewed it all with a jaundiced perspective. As such, I missed a lot of opportunities.
Examples: Girl asks me out -- but I assumed it's to make her ex jealous. Years later she's like "What WAS your problem?" Decades later I got the ultimate freelance writing gig, but didn't pitch too much because I felt like the editor's crew was cliquish. A year later, they called and said "Why don't you participate more? We'd be happy to run your articles several times a week, not just once a month." In other words, I lost out on thousands of dollars because I assumed I was being "tolerated" not liked. Live and learn!