Someone should make a viral article called, "Dating tips for the Non-Feminist Man."
"This post is in honour of Non-Feminist Men and their dating rituals
1.) Wake up on bed sheets made by oppressed women in Bangladesh
2.) Look in mirror, affirm to yourself, "I will oppress and subjugate today."
3.) Check mail, pick up latest issue of "Patriarchy Today"
4.) Call the office, tell the H.R. girl to cut all female salaries by 5%. Tell her to wear the red heels later that night.
5.) Go to Starbucks, cut to the front of the line. Get the cashier's phone number.
6.) Juggle texts from 10 different prospects for the night. Get their names mixed up. Set up dates with 4 of them.
7.) Meet at that high end cocktail lounge with that once chick with the fake tits. Heather? Jennifer? Whatever. Show up 20 minutes late
8.) Tell your boy behind the bar to drop an extra hit of GHB in hers, but not before insisting the drinks go on her tab
9.) Uber it back to your place
10.) Scissor her clothes off, making sure to use nitrile gloves, not latex. Much higher quality.
11.) Rape rape rape rape rape
12.) Have the uber driver take her to the motel 6 right down the street.
13.) Look in mirror. Flex bicep. Count your privileges.
14.) Rinse. Repeat.
"This post is in honour of Non-Feminist Men and their dating rituals
1.) Wake up on bed sheets made by oppressed women in Bangladesh
2.) Look in mirror, affirm to yourself, "I will oppress and subjugate today."
3.) Check mail, pick up latest issue of "Patriarchy Today"
4.) Call the office, tell the H.R. girl to cut all female salaries by 5%. Tell her to wear the red heels later that night.
5.) Go to Starbucks, cut to the front of the line. Get the cashier's phone number.
6.) Juggle texts from 10 different prospects for the night. Get their names mixed up. Set up dates with 4 of them.
7.) Meet at that high end cocktail lounge with that once chick with the fake tits. Heather? Jennifer? Whatever. Show up 20 minutes late
8.) Tell your boy behind the bar to drop an extra hit of GHB in hers, but not before insisting the drinks go on her tab
9.) Uber it back to your place
10.) Scissor her clothes off, making sure to use nitrile gloves, not latex. Much higher quality.
11.) Rape rape rape rape rape
12.) Have the uber driver take her to the motel 6 right down the street.
13.) Look in mirror. Flex bicep. Count your privileges.
14.) Rinse. Repeat.