[Giovonny]

(08-27-2012 03:55 PM)pitt Wrote:  

By the way, i always think about your post in relation to fear, it was a classic post..do you remember what thread it was on? i want to share it with some of my friends.

Pitt,

I think you mean this one:

(04-16-2012 09:37 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

(04-16-2012 02:20 PM)WesternCancer Wrote:  

Giovonny: how do you go about figuring out fears + eliminating them from your mind? Any resources or tips to share?

WesternCancer,

Here is a bunch of stuff that I wrote over the last few years. Alot of it will sound repetitive but I think you will find some techniques that you like.

However, my philosophy and techniques are always evolving. At the end of this post I will write my most current and up-to-date plan for eliminating fear from your body and mind

(02-09-2012 01:14 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

The short answer is to simply do more repititions of whatever it is that you're scared of. If your scared to talk to girls, talk to 100 girls, if your scared to give speeches, give 100 speeches.

Facing your fear head on is the alpha thing to do!

I also recommened doing things that are much scarier then talking to girls like:

skydiving
bungee jumping
handling large snakes
Public speaking
fighting (like live sparring for boxing/mma)
talking to a therapist about your deepest fears (this is a highly underrated inner game tactic)


And simultaneously,

Addresing your specific fears like:

heights
flying
the dark
etc.

When you eliminate your deep seeded childhood fears, all other little fears melt away. Fear and confidence are in a constant struggle to control your mind. Attack your fear and feed your confidence!

(02-10-2012 03:01 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

This type of stuff has worked for me. I take fear elimination very serious.

Conquering my fear and feeding my confidence has been maybe the most important thing in my life the last few years. I realized that the less fear I have, the happier I am, the more free I am. That might be the most fundamental part of Game - having no fear. Its so liberating. You don't have to worry about people judging you, people liking you, or trying to fit in. You are free to just be yourself and have fun. You don't give a fuck! (when fear is gone)

I can't live with fear. I feel like a little pussy loser who is afraid to face the world. So I attack fear. I've talked to many sports psychologists and many colleagues in psychology to develop a strategy that works for my specific situation. I work hard on "inner game" because game begins in the mind.

Fear has infected many people. Everybody is so scared of everything. I can't live like that. I live for fearlessness.

(02-11-2012 03:29 PM)pitt Wrote:  

Giovonny just one more thing. You mentioned all important things apart from working out or lifting weights, dont you think that this can be a very effective tool in eliminating fear? Dont you think that this can help eliminating fear?

(02-12-2012 01:53 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

Working on all aspects of your appearance is very important!

You want to look as good as possible, of course.

But I consider that "outer game". It doesn't fix the weaknesses is your mind. (though it may help them somewhat)

I think we have to work on both at the same time.

If lifting weights works for you then of course due it hard.

But, don't ignore those little fears that are in the back of your head when you go to bed at night. If you can conquer those, you will go to another level.

I'm trying to get to an almost spiritual level where its like I'm on ecstasy even though I'm not.

http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-6994-page-3.html

(02-12-2012 03:33 PM)pitt Wrote:  

Do you mind if you breakdown how you go along with skydiving, bungee jumping, handling large snakes etc, i mean, do you do those activities on regular basis (for example twice a week) or you reccommend to do it for a one time life experience

(02-12-2012 04:18 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

I didn't know about "game" when I did those things, but now when I look back, I think those things helped me. I've only done those things once in my life and would never do them again but I'm glad I did it once. With skydiving and bungee-jumping, once is enough to shake you up a little. I thought I was dead, so when I got back on the ground I was approaching like crazy.

You should do something extreme like this asap AND find a fear eliminating exercise that you can do on a regular basis. Maybe a boxing/mma gym or a rock climbing class or firing range where you can shoot guns or surfing or something that will force you to face some fear.

AND, You should identify the top 2 or 3 fears that are holding you back from being the man you want to be and aggressively attack them.

AND, you should consider talking to a professional therapist about any fear that you may have carried from your childhood. If you have any "issues", deal with them honestly and aggressively.

Design a fear elimination game plan and get to work.

So you are doing extreme once in a lifetime stuff, regular confidence boosting maintenance, and also working on root of the problem in your mind. AND, at the same time you are improving your "outer game" in terms of appearance, vibe, and conversation.

Thats what I would do. (Thats what worked for me)

Oh, and I must admit, these helped alot too..

http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-6998.html

(09-29-2011 04:08 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

Something related that I posted last year:

I learned this by accident but something that helped me was DOING THINGS THAT WERE MUCH SCARIER THEN APPROACHING GIRLS.

I went skydiving and nearly shit my pants, when i got back on the ground i couldn't wait to approach girls..i had just experienced a great deal of fear and i was laughing it off...approaching girls didn't seem that scary anymore.

Other things that helped were boxing in the Golden Gloves, talking to my mom about why she left my dad, bungee jumping, etc. The bottom line is the more you face your fears...the less fear you will have stored in your body/mind...when you eliminate all that fear, approaching girls is easy.

(07-06-2011 04:26 AM)Giovonny Wrote:  

Another way to increase confidence is to deal with any unresolved emotional issues that you might have. I think that stuff is deep Inner Game. Carrying around alot of emotional baggage can have a negative effect on your vibe. Sometimes you gotta just stay home alone for a few days and really think about stuff. If you have more internal peace, you might be more comfortable and have more confidence.

Talking to my parents about why they divorced helped me get over alot of anger and pain.

Which allowed me to be more relaxed and soften my vibe so that it was more attractive to females. My sense of humor picked up and my attitude was more playful and less intense. I started dressing with more swag because I was more comfortable with who I was.

Forgiving someone, forgiving yourself, having a heart to heart talk with a parent or sibling, these kinds of things can sometimes release weight off your chest and allow you to display more of your "best self".

As far as approaching girls to build confidence?

I think its the best way. Because you are killing 8 birds with one stone.

When you approach a cute girl, you are working on your:

confidence
vibe
body language
eye-ball language
conversational skills
social skills
quick wit/humor
quick thinking/problem solving

And it builds the right kind of confidence. Confidence in talking to cute girls.

Here is my most current answer:

If fear is controlling your life and you lack confidence..

Get professional help!

Yes, that is my answer. If your fear is paralyzing you and you can barely take action, that is what you need. You can figure it out on your own but that will take alot longer and wil have alot more ups and downs. A professional psychologist or therapist can help you identify your fears, their causes, and how to eliminate them. Those people do this everyday. This will kick start and accelerate your fear elimination process. Try different people and find one that you like. Once you get your fears identified and their roots, you can really get to work. I only did this for about a month when I was a teen but I wish I would have done it more.

I would compare it to getting into game. What would be better? Reading and studying on your own? Or, doing a bootcamp with Roosh?

The bootcamp with Roosh would probably be more helpful. Because he is A PROFESSIONAL!

Spend the money, take the time, get professional help!

Doctors, psychologists, psychiatrists, therapists, counselors, life coaches, puas, etc.

Find the people who are experts at your situation!

Also,

Here are some techniques that I didn't mention in the earlier posts..

1)Google "eliminating fear" and educate yourself

http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHNY...ating+fear

2)Read books on the subject

Here an author that I like:

http://www.oshoquotes.net/2009/12/osho-q...-of-death/

3) Traveling

For some reason experiencing another far away culture often helps eliminate some fear.

4) Meditation

This means different things to different people. For me, its just getting into a situation where I don't have to think, I can just react and play. I play soccer, basketball, and tennis. I do yoga. I dance. These things allow me to operate without thoughts or fears. These things come mostly from my muscle memory, I don't have to think. This break from fear and thought allows me to just live/play without feeling any fear. I am a guy who sees that there is no reason to be scared. If I am scared, then I am confused by my thoughts. Make sense?