I've been cooking on this all day and I think I have a variation that might serve a wider audience. It might need work still, but I think this is going in a direction that could work:
1. Do everything you have described above in procuring a tub of food. I'd suggest two, in fact. Get egg rolls and other finger foods only (fried and greasy, of course).
2. Bring a folding stool, plastic crate, or other make-shift stand. Alternatively, find a conveniently located hood of a car to post up.
3. Bring a poster board-sized sign with the words FREE SNACKS FOR GIRLS written on it. Add in smaller lettering, JUST FILL OUT SHORT SURVEY.
4. Have a friend with a camera rolling. As the point-man, try to corral in the fatties especially. They'll be low-hanging fruit anyway.
5. Say this is all for a "school project." "I waited till the last minute. It's due next week."
6. Have a survey with some hilarious questions on it. The title should be something normal-sounding: NIGHT-LIFE RESEARCH SURVEY. Have a section for their "statistical information": first name, age, height, weight. Take mental note of distortions as they fill that section out, or as they skip certain questions. Then have questions about whether they ever fart in public, around their significant other? Have they ever physically confronted a man in public? Have they ever danced on top of a bar? What do they think about girls with short hair (multiple choice)? Keep it short and not too obvious or insulting. Subtlety is king.
7. When they're done, let them take an egg roll. Have a sauce there for dipping. Film the dipping and eating.
8. The surveys might not turn out to be so funny (though they probably will be), but the video will be solid gold. You'll get all kinds of interesting eating footage, lining up of hogs, riffing with the fatties. You'll probably get confronted at some point, like: "What the FUCK is this?!" with fattitude.
9. Bring a cannister of pepper spray.
10. Have an escape plan, and don't bring anything you can't carry while running or walking briskly. A third friend as a spotter is not a bad idea. He can deflect the drunk sausages and alert you to any fatty stampedes or attacks.
*11. Share results with forum.
1. Do everything you have described above in procuring a tub of food. I'd suggest two, in fact. Get egg rolls and other finger foods only (fried and greasy, of course).
2. Bring a folding stool, plastic crate, or other make-shift stand. Alternatively, find a conveniently located hood of a car to post up.
3. Bring a poster board-sized sign with the words FREE SNACKS FOR GIRLS written on it. Add in smaller lettering, JUST FILL OUT SHORT SURVEY.
4. Have a friend with a camera rolling. As the point-man, try to corral in the fatties especially. They'll be low-hanging fruit anyway.
5. Say this is all for a "school project." "I waited till the last minute. It's due next week."
6. Have a survey with some hilarious questions on it. The title should be something normal-sounding: NIGHT-LIFE RESEARCH SURVEY. Have a section for their "statistical information": first name, age, height, weight. Take mental note of distortions as they fill that section out, or as they skip certain questions. Then have questions about whether they ever fart in public, around their significant other? Have they ever physically confronted a man in public? Have they ever danced on top of a bar? What do they think about girls with short hair (multiple choice)? Keep it short and not too obvious or insulting. Subtlety is king.
7. When they're done, let them take an egg roll. Have a sauce there for dipping. Film the dipping and eating.
8. The surveys might not turn out to be so funny (though they probably will be), but the video will be solid gold. You'll get all kinds of interesting eating footage, lining up of hogs, riffing with the fatties. You'll probably get confronted at some point, like: "What the FUCK is this?!" with fattitude.
9. Bring a cannister of pepper spray.
10. Have an escape plan, and don't bring anything you can't carry while running or walking briskly. A third friend as a spotter is not a bad idea. He can deflect the drunk sausages and alert you to any fatty stampedes or attacks.
*11. Share results with forum.