[Kabal]

Ha, cool idea. I would, however, remove the random interjections of "bro" -- it's distracting, adds no value, and takes away from the tongue-in-cheek satire.

It's a bit peculiar how many Wall Street guys are married. You'd think hearing terms like "depreciating asset," "opportunity cost," "diversification," "negative convexity," etc. everyday would make them recognize these things in their personal lives.