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Official Lies
#10

Official Lies

Bush, Obama, Bernanke, & Co.: "Oh shit, the economy's going into the toilet, what do we do? We can't fix misguided policies much because they make some people really rich and they'd be ticked, so let's print money, and let's wage a long-term media campaign to convince the buying public that the crisis is over so they start spending money again, giving some fuel to our economy."

Flunkie: "But boss, the economy's not getting better, we can't have the media tell outright lies!"

Obama to Secretary of Labor: "What good news can you give me?"

BLS chief: "Uhh... well, actually, we were counting jobs in a really antiquated way before, but with our new statistical analysis, it looks like unemployment is down boss!"
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