Quote: (01-28-2013 04:24 AM)bojangles Wrote:
I think speakeasy you're right about shyness being genetic (i don't have any scientific studies to prove it) as most of my first cousins are shy. The weird part though is that every parent in the generation above is not, they are all outspoken and generally say what the hell they want.
Could shyness be down to parenting?
But then you see little toddlers expressing signs of shyness, and parenting can have had minimal effect at that period of life.
Shyness is really a fear of trauma that was learned at some point even if we can't remember it. Part of why it can be difficult to get over is that the trauma happened so early on that we can't remember or at a time where we could not process what was going on. Personality is largely formed by age 3. There may be some genetic influence on sensitivity to trauma though.
When it comes to parenting, I think the parents' social status will have a lot to do with it. Toddlers are naturally very assertive for what they want, and for most parents, their primary goal is to get the child to do what the parents want them to do. In other words, their goal is to make the little one submissive. If the parents are those who is taking it from the man all day, the last thing they are going to do is take it form some baby less than a tenth their size. The personality will form around this and become very beta. If it is formed primarily around the mother's influence, it will be a personality that learns to be submissive to women. You really can't blame these types. They learned to act this way out of their own survival.