[Prowl]

I tell chicks that I'm a dolphin trainer, and then sometimes go into a bit about how they're the only animals other than humans that recreationally masturbate but that they sometimes need coaching to that effect, or something about getting them to mate, or whatever.

Obviously no one believes any of that shit in DC, which is sort of the point.


I get this question a LOT though, especially lately. I think it might have been a hairstyle change, but chicks are all like looking at me and smirking and going "What do YOU do? Looks like something political maybe?", or w/e. Then we talk about dolphin masturbation.