L-l-l-let's break it down...
The girl actually comes off as pretty cool, attractive and down-to-Earth. I don't know how much post-date editing takes place on these Date Lab reports, but I think he could have had a shot.
I think he didn't make any one huge mistake, but he made so many little ones they just brought on a 'Failure Cascade' that goes from bad to worse.
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Chris: A person who can laugh at both herself and me when I do something sporadic (like dancing in the aisles of Whole Foods when a song comes on).
This basically summarises the guy as he comes across for the entire report. Being jovial and light-hearted can be the sign of a popular alpha, but when that enters total self-deprivation (like the example provided), the pendulum swings in the opposite direction. Furthermore, dancing to songs in a supermarket can be seen as pretty 'immature' if not carried off with style (
this is seriously the best example I could find of it being done in 'style').
This summary almost goes against what he wants in a woman, which is...
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who can have a good time but is mature.
Whereas her ideal match is probably one of the sanest descriptions I've ever seen from a woman. It's an honest but realistic...
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Claire: Taller than me in heels. Active, doesn’t have to be super fit, but has [the] ability to work out with me. Someone who is funny. Someone who can talk about what’s on their mind.
So let's pull him apart a bit more...
The Look:
Why, sweet Jesus!? Why!? A bow-tie!? Are you fucking
Charlie from The Newsroom? No!? Then fuck me, why the Hell are you wearing a bow-tie that makes you look like a clown!? You say that you have a good body, then why don't you ditch the whole 'top button' deal and let your chiseled chest have its day!? I think bow-ties should be reserved for comedians and guys who have to futilely rely on 'quirkiness' for attention. Of course, that's just my opinion and I'm sure some players on this forum could carry that off very well. But this guy? Nah.
It's impressive how his thoughts about his own appearance go from...
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When I walked out in my chinos and bow tie, my manager was like, “Whoa. That’s a total transformation,” so I was feeling good.
To...
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I look like I’m 14. I look like a high schooler, but we’re actually the same age.
His Inner Game is totally demolished as he has to face the fact that, although his manager may have commented on his 'transformation' (note: not an actual compliment), he knows deep down that he is not dressed to a standard that he expects from himself. He, deep down, thinks that he looks hilarious in that get-up, but this is only truly highlighted when he compares himself to her. Just... yeah. I could spend all day breaking down what that says for his confidence, but my final note on this part will be...
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He’s really cute but kind of young. I noticed he had a very nice smile, and he was very well put together: chinos, button-down, bow tie.
If Greek Kamaki reads this: You know those English girls who go to the Mediterranean on a holiday together and they always wear matching t-shirts and/or hotpants and they have cute nick-names on the back of their clothes which they just made up for one another at the t-shirt printing shop about their appearances and they're always like 'Nice Boobs', 'Nice Legs' and the fat one is always stuck with something shitty like 'Nice Eyes'?
Yeah, this is kind of similar to that. Being 'very well put together' is not something that will make a girl squirt. My car is 'very well put together' but that doesn't mean I want to fuck it. It's the sort of compliment that you give when you have nothing else to say which isn't mean.
The Game:
I think it's telling how she describes the content of their conversation vaguely over three lines of text, whereas he describes it in detail and practically lists all of the reasons she has value over him. It sounds like she made some sort of profound emotional impact on him, whereas she stays a little disconnected - like a normal human being would do.
However, she does mention...
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He’s very into fitness and does triathlons.
Which leads onto...
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And then he ordered a Diet Coke! At first, I felt kind of awkward,
Yeah, yeah - she used the 'A' word. She's right though. If she is drinking and he's not, then she's going to drink less anyway and he's going to lose the opportunity to escalate.
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But he quickly explained that when he’s in training, he doesn’t drink.
Oh fuck off with your 'fitness' and 'training' bullshit. Maybe he tried to use this as a DHV, but really? You won't have one drink even though you're on Date Lab with a pretty hot blonde?
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and that he’s passionate about that, and it’s a good thing to be passionate about.
I do hope that's a word-for-word quote, because it only echoes the whole 'try to say something nice when you can't think of anything nice to say' sentiment she's been carrying off about this guy. Moreover, it is good to be 'passionate' about something but I think it's irrelevant and not necessary to this interaction.
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I like to take things slowly, especially on a first date, especially on a blind date! So, I’m not too overly touchy-feely. But in terms of conversation, we were definitely into that. We couldn’t stop. There was not a single dead spot of conversation.
YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR PENIS INTO A CONVERSATION, NO MATTER HOW MANY 'DEAD SPOTS' ARE OR AREN'T THERE.
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The pictures were really the only awkward thing. We had to keep asking people to take our pictures. And this one guy was like, “C’mon, I want to see some romance!” And we were like, “It’s only our first date!”
Cute. The guy should have really grown some balls at this part though. Check this out...
Behind-the-back-of-the-seat-hand: Hover-hand's little sister!
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he did send me a text to say he had an amazing time.
Head, meet desk. What the fuck man!? Did
she text
you to say that!? No!? Then why the fuck are you jumping the gun and throwing in a tremendous amount of emotional investment already!?
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We may go see a movie.
I don't want to live on this planet any more.
Bang, along with common sense, tells us that cinemas are among the worst places in the world to go on a date; it's a crowded place with no opportunity to talk and you can wave bye-bye to any chances of physical escalation. Going to a movie on a date also optimises that dreadful 'you alone are not worth my attention - we must be doing something else at the same time' theme that runs throughout so many relationships in the Western world.
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Claire had to back out of a planned second date, and Chris’s training regimen has made rescheduling complicated. “I would like to see him again if we can both fit it in,” she says. Meanwhile, Chris tells us, “The more we e-mail and talk, the more and more I am liking her and seeing this developing into a possible relationship.”
Haha - 'if we can both fit it in'. This means, as others in this thread have concluded, that she will never be able to fit it in.
And my God, they're
e-mailing!? I have no idea why people would want to e-mail if they can text instead. E-mail just screams 'you are not worth the texts in my contract that it would cost me to interact with you' to me.
The Conclusion:
The girl seemed to be pretty cool. The guy fucked up with his look, lack of Inner Game, unwillingness to drink, subsequent unwillingness to escalate, a great emotional investment which was not even near her wavelength and the fact that he is content with 'conversation' alone.