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Remarks on Online Dating - Divorco - 11-29-2012

I just reactivated my Plenty of Fish and OKCupid accounts.

1) Women are dumb about the technology. A typical woman's profile has one grainy laptop photo and no information about her except that she wants a good relationship. She hasn't heard of other dating sites and doesn't know how to attach photos.

2) Men get few messages. Moreover, the quality is even worse than the quantity. I have had women fifteen years older message me, and plenty of uglies. Women get a lot of inappropriate messages too (inappropriate age/race, nude photos, lame compliments, etc.)

http://jonmillward.com/blog/attraction-d...xperiment/

Some women will "window shop" message tons of guys, and then give short, uninformative messages. One woman messaged me, set a date, cancelled, and then blocked me.

3) Free dating sites are very flaky. Some women have been on there for years. I looked at my old Inboxes, and most of the women deleted their accounts. The hot women usually delete their accounts soon. But the remaining accounts belong to women who were difficult pains in the ass. They were picky, inflexible, and just weird about dating. Some of my female friends have permanent profiles, but never actually meet men. They just delude themselves messaging guys and wasting everyone's time.

A girl can fight with her boyfriend, whip out her camera phone, and have a profile in five minutes. Yes, it happens in real life too. But many online women have boyfriends and are shopping for upgrades. They are not really available.

These same problems afflict women. Losers and spammers send a disproportionate share of messages. I know a dude who sent out 5,000 messages to much younger women with no responses before giving up! Now I get messages from cyber-fantasy women just trolling, criticizing my profile, or otherwise wasting my time.

I guess that is point. There are plenty of time-wasters out there. At first, I spent 80% of my time on 20% of the manipulative time-wasters. No more. It is triage time.

Remarks on Online Dating - Timoteo - 11-29-2012

I hear you. I have an account on Tagged, and I've maintained it since 2008. Every one of your observations is 100% accurate. There's a lot you have to wade through. Most women are incredibly flaky, and the others are undesirable for one reason or another. Women are there mostly to receive attention, as opposed to actually meeting someone. Tagged actually just sent out a survey to members about spam, asking for feedback about where on the site we're encountering it, how often, etc. The thing I like about the site is that they're always trying to improve it.

I've gotten bangs, and made nice friendships on the site. Sure, I've had to weed chicks that don't communicate occasionally, but overall it's been a solid experience for me there. I've thought about trying different sites as well, but I don't want to invest the time in multiple sites at the same time.

Remarks on Online Dating - alecks - 11-29-2012

dudes ^ didnt want to make another thread on this but just want some quick advice for the young player (20 y/o) on okc,badoo,tagged etc.

i created an okc account but dont have a pic or info yet.its basically just a troll account for the moment.ive looked through tons of chicks profiles my age and its very discouraging to say the least.

Every chick thats a 7,yes a 7 or over have shitty profiles and its like they dont want to be talked to at all.

"dont message me if you black,asian,over 25,have no profile pic etc etc etc etc the list goes on.and the rest of the chicks are absolutely disgusting with retarded info.YOLO YOLO love my girls stupid bullshit.how do you get around that shit?

If i do make a proper account i was advised to just have 2 or 3 pics of me doing something interesting etc.im a good looking dude but im not sure what info i should put on my profile.any advice on profile info? smaller the better? thanks

Remarks on Online Dating - Timoteo - 11-29-2012

Quote: (11-29-2012 04:18 PM)alecks Wrote:  

dudes ^ didnt want to make another thread on this but just want some quick advice for the young player (20 y/o) on okc,badoo,tagged etc.

i created an okc account but dont have a pic or info yet.its basically just a troll account for the moment.ive looked through tons of chicks profiles my age and its very discouraging to say the least.

Every chick thats a 7,yes a 7 or over have shitty profiles and its like they dont want to be talked to at all.

"dont message me if you black,asian,over 25,have no profile pic etc etc etc etc the list goes on.and the rest of the chicks are absolutely disgusting with retarded info.YOLO YOLO love my girls stupid bullshit.how do you get around that shit?

If i do make a proper account i was advised to just have 2 or 3 pics of me doing something interesting etc.im a good looking dude but im not sure what info i should put on my profile.any advice on profile info? smaller the better? thanks

First, you're right about women's profiles. They project more negativity and bitchiness than anything else, as they focus too much on what they don't like or don't want. There's really no getting around it. Just initiate with chicks that you find attractive enough to fuck and see where you can take it. As for YOUR profile, I'm a believer in putting together a tight profile, a profile that projects the man that you are. If you're going to have a profile, post a good one. Post MORE than 2 or 3 pics, but definitely pics of interesting activities. If you're good looking and fit, post pics that show that. Fill in the profile categories completely, but not too wordy. Clear and concise, because most dumb bitches don't want to read too much because they have the attention span of children. Try to portray that you're a cool guy worth meeting.

Remarks on Online Dating - MrXY - 11-29-2012

Ongoing 77 page thread on online dating here: http://http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-3601.html

Remarks on Online Dating - Wayout - 11-30-2012

I was playing on OK cupid a month ago. I would almost always get a reply from a woman if I sent her an insult of some sort. Examples " Damn...your fat! You like eating?" or "You like cum on your big tits?". Some would reply with Fuck you. Some would start a conversation like :..well, it depends whos cum it is...
Bitches are crazy!

Remarks on Online Dating - Screwston - 11-30-2012

Yeah, it's funny seeing girls on there 3 and 4 years later. I don't know if they're actually meeting guys on there or soaking up the attention or what the hell's going on with them. I can only mess with online dating when I'm drunk or high. Everything about the girls on there just pisses me off and makes me want to punch my computer screen.

Remarks on Online Dating - speakeasy - 11-30-2012

Quote: (11-30-2012 03:24 AM)houston Wrote:  

Everything about the girls on there just pisses me off and makes me want to punch my computer screen.

This.

I probably should have a dating profile, but reading through the profiles of woman after woman actually leaves me depressed. And that was like 5 years ago. I can't even imagine what it's like now wading through all that bullshit. If I did open a profile, I'd probably only message girls on one where the women are required to pay for a membership to weed out women who aren't serious about meeting anyone.

Remarks on Online Dating - bojangles - 11-30-2012

I feel the same houston, so I've just resorted to trolling and in some cases taking apart their profiles line by line and deconstructing their hamsterizations, fucking stupid cunts [Image: biggrin.gif]

Remarks on Online Dating - Vicious - 11-30-2012

Uhhh... You guys need a hobby. He who wrestles with monsters should see to it that he does not himself becomes a monster.

Remarks on Online Dating - Divorco - 11-30-2012

I should have titled this thread "Returning to Online Dating" or "Time-Wasters" to emphasize:

1) I see old familiar faces. Some are reestablishing contact.

2) Long-term online daters are not serious. Some are impossibly picky, never schedule dates, or always flake. Or they can be difficult on dates, refusing to flirt, drink, or escalate. There is a reason why these women are perpetually single.

3) New faces can be time-wasters too. Sometimes they message me and delete their accounts. Or after initiating contact, they give short responses, stop messaging, refuse to give numbers, refuse to call, etc. I think they get online and go crazy messaging all the cute guys. They get overwhelmed my the volume of messages and responses. Or they are just fucking stupid and illiterate. It hardly matters.

I worried my bad online game was encouraging rejection or bad behavior by ugly women. But fake profiles with handsome guys got the same treatment. After reactivating my online accouts, I see the same women pulling the same shit, and new women reenacting familiar behavior. Now I'm not going to meet or message for long without seeing decent pics. I'm not going to send long messages in response to short ones. And I'm not going to chase women who don't cough up phone numbers. It's triage time!

Remarks on Online Dating - el mechanico - 11-30-2012

Post: #12RE: Remarks on Online Mackin
I haven't been on up in a while so I be goin ta check up in n' share mah thoughts. I was thankin before ta just block every last muthafuckin muthafucka whoz there fo' muthafuckin years and online nonquit ta clean it up a bit.

Remarks on Online Dating - BCZalgyris - 12-02-2012

I've been on OKCupid for 2 years now and have a friend who met his fiancee from there (see point 3) and another who has banged multiple women from there so I feel I am plenty qualified to talk about the site. Here are my honest remarks about OKCupid and online dating sites in general (also used Plenty of Fish before that).

PLEASE NOTE: My remarks should be taken with a grain of salt as I do have certain criteria which I used to weed out dates. Thus my comments might not be relevant to guys on this forum who have low standards and only want SNL (single night lays) or who are willing to bang women of any age group. For me the only age group I consider on OKCupid is 22-32 years (I am 33 years old). Also I come from Washington, DC which as everyone on these forums knows is an exceptionally difficult city for dating, similar to San (Man) Jose of Cali:

1. If you expect girls to message you first, who are serious about meeting up and not just trollin' then you will waiting a very long time. I've had only around 6 messages in a year to my profile (which I do update on a frequent basis and honestly think is top notch with all relevant questions answered and good photo's of myself posted) yet at least couple hundred "connections"/hits but most were women in the 1-5 range in terms of looks.
Went out with the best one (a 5) on several dates but had to drop her as I didn't feel it. So, the guy is ALWAYS expected to make the first move in online dating and for those guys who wait for a dream girl to message them it will not happen, your chances of winning the lotto would be higher. No matter how nice your profile do not expect women to message you, unlike in bars/clubs where I've had attractive women hit on me occasionally.

2. Again I have to mention the fact that there are very few attractive women and even the unattractive one's tend to have high standards ....every time I search for a chick to message in the Washington, DC area I have to weed out dozen's of profiles. Either the women are fat, have kids, bad looking (short hair, tattoos/piercings all over, ultra nerdy-hipster look), or a combination of all the above. If the female population of the world looked like the one on OKCupid I might have to turn into a celibate monk Lol

3. My friend who is a decent looking guy and works out like crazy met his fiancee there after sending outs dozen's of long-winded letter's, customizing each letter and making it sound like he was an ideal man for each one, then going out on multiple dates, and unfortunately lowering his standards...as many girls don't look anything like their pictures in-person. He basically made it a full time job in the evenings/weekends to message girls before he found one with whom he was compatible. I am still shocked how any sane human can "waste" thousands of hours on online dating sites but miracles do happen so I keep on truckin'

4. Persistence and perseverence is necessary (See point 3 ), even more so then at bars with bad ratios. On average on sites like OKCupid, women who are 7+ are bombarded with dozen's, sometimes hundreds of messages per day thus unless one can be the "casa nova of penmanship" you will not get their attention.

5. Quality over quantity! I have experimented with both template/chain letters and custom letter's tailored to women's profiles and of course the latter got more responses. However, what surprised me is how ineffective mass letter's can be; At first I though women would be delighted to get messages from me (even if they were simple two liners) as I am a good looking, college educated/gainfully employed guy however that was not the case.
Based on my research the ratio is at least 30:1 from template/chain letters, meaning if you send out a generic e-mail to 30 women you'll be lucky to get one serious response.
As for custom letter's where I mentioned the women's hobbies, answered their profile questions, asked interesting questions in return, and bragged a bit about myself the ratio was more like 10:1 (for every 10 letters, one response).

Well, that's all the remarks I can come up with about online dating but would love to hear the "horror" stories from other's on here who are also looking for relationships online and not just SNL's. Also, I am wandering if any of you guys here have been on paid sites (like match.com, e-harmony, etc.) and how they compare to the free one's like OKCupid and POF. Is the quality any better? Thanks.

Remarks on Online Dating - Surreyman - 12-02-2012

Quote: (12-02-2012 01:07 AM)BCZalgyris Wrote:  

Also, I am wandering if any of you guys here have been on paid sites (like match.com, e-harmony, etc.) and how they compare to the free one's like OKCupid and POF. Is the quality any better? Thanks.

I was on a paid site (https://soulmates.guardian.co.uk/) last year, before I'd ever touched OKCupid, and I was still assuming that getting a girl on there was something like chatting a girl up in a club.

Sent about 12 messages, got 3 replies, one date, became an LTR. Only problem with that site is the severe shortage of under 25s, and how everyone lives in London. You also can't see who's paid and who hasn't, so you don't know if they can respond to you.

My experiences on OKCupid have been very different. Got a few off it, but it was mostly a question of luck. Women are very particular about building a rapport, and it's hard for them to do that to do that online, since they communicate with far more non-verbal cues than men.

Remarks on Online Dating - Andy_B - 12-04-2012

The best thing you can do if you want to succeed at online dating is to simply pay attention to what's going on.

Look at other guys' profiles and make sure yours has better pictures, is more interesting, and comes across more confident. Read chicks' profiles and comment on them. Understand that a profile with only two sentences for a profile indicates someone who is unwilling to invest time and effort, and will likely expect you to pull all the weight (if they even respond at all). You'll get more replies to 10 legit, well thought out messages than 100 spam messages.

Remarks on Online Dating - storm - 12-04-2012

Quote: (12-04-2012 10:19 PM)Andy_B Wrote:  

The best thing you can do if you want to succeed at online dating is to simply pay attention to what's going on.

Look at other guys' profiles and make sure yours has better pictures, is more interesting, and comes across more confident. Read chicks' profiles and comment on them. Understand that a profile with only two sentences for a profile indicates someone who is unwilling to invest time and effort, and will likely expect you to pull all the weight (if they even respond at all). You'll get more replies to 10 legit, well thought out messages than 100 spam messages.

Can you provide an example of what you mean by that. In your experience, per ten of those posts, how many translate into meeting in person.

Remarks on Online Dating - Andy_B - 12-04-2012

Quote: (12-04-2012 10:39 PM)storm Wrote:  

Quote: (12-04-2012 10:19 PM)Andy_B Wrote:  

The best thing you can do if you want to succeed at online dating is to simply pay attention to what's going on.

Look at other guys' profiles and make sure yours has better pictures, is more interesting, and comes across more confident. Read chicks' profiles and comment on them. Understand that a profile with only two sentences for a profile indicates someone who is unwilling to invest time and effort, and will likely expect you to pull all the weight (if they even respond at all). You'll get more replies to 10 legit, well thought out messages than 100 spam messages.

Can you provide an example of what you mean by that. In your experience, per ten of those posts, how many translate into meeting in person.

Probably 0.2?

Mass copy and paste mailing doesn't work because girls get so much of it that they can recognize even the cleverly worded messages that superficially appear improvised.

Remarks on Online Dating - RandalGraves - 12-04-2012

I use a mass, one-line cold read. The only thing I've been using for a while, and it works well.

Remarks on Online Dating - Balkanite - 12-04-2012

Quote: (12-04-2012 10:42 PM)Andy_B Wrote:  

Quote: (12-04-2012 10:39 PM)storm Wrote:  

Quote: (12-04-2012 10:19 PM)Andy_B Wrote:  

The best thing you can do if you want to succeed at online dating is to simply pay attention to what's going on.

Look at other guys' profiles and make sure yours has better pictures, is more interesting, and comes across more confident. Read chicks' profiles and comment on them. Understand that a profile with only two sentences for a profile indicates someone who is unwilling to invest time and effort, and will likely expect you to pull all the weight (if they even respond at all). You'll get more replies to 10 legit, well thought out messages than 100 spam messages.

Can you provide an example of what you mean by that. In your experience, per ten of those posts, how many translate into meeting in person.

Probably 0.2?

Mass copy and paste mailing doesn't work because girls get so much of it that they can recognize even the cleverly worded messages that superficially appear improvised.
Exactly. I get messages from fatties like this. I do not respond.

Remarks on Online Dating - savilerow - 12-05-2012

I think women online have something against men online.

For instance, they see it like they are just "playing the field", expanding their already massive pool of options (assuming above a 6.5).

They generally see men on there as having some undesirable quality (even when they do themselves, usually slightly fat, multiple kids). There's a bit of a double standard there. An attractive man using online dating, it instantly lowers his overall status. There is something inherantly "low game" about it. For an attractive woman, it doesn't matter at all.

Sometimes, I'll open a POF profile then close it after few months later just to reset everything. To be on there too much never looks good - regardless of what city you're in (big/medium/small).

You can also hide your profile, but this means your profile doesn't show up in search.

I have noticed what others have said...there's women on there for YEARS. Also, alot of the "I don't sleep with guys on the first date", do the opposite. A lot of times college educated middle class women are actually easier in terms of a fling. They have a lot of this "ethical slut" mentality. I also think college educated white women are more open to dating a minority.

Where I live, in the midwest, there just aren't many great options on POF (compared to major coastal cities, LA seems to have several hot chicks on POF). I've met women that I've had short-term involvements with, only do it to get back at their boyfriends, get back with their boyfriends...but here's the kicker...they're still on POF.

Hairstylist/makeup/non-formally educated types are more difficult for some reason.

Remarks on Online Dating - malc - 12-06-2012

Meh, online dating is time efficient in big cities, even for men in the end. It's even better when your life is a cockfest and your a workaholic. And as a workaholic you want to get sleep instead of just going out late at night and spending too much money on overpriced beer when you can going rock climbing with your friends and sleeping.

You just treat it like a sales funnel. Some girls on there have lives where it's a lady land like nurses, occupational therapists, elementary school teachers and mostly female friends. Online dating also exposes you to really random groups of people that you might never encounter in your life. Many women never go out to typical night game places or go to malls with any sort of frequency.

After spending a couple of hours on a profile once:

1. Tab out 30 girls your interested in
2. Say hello, ask a couple of questions, only put in 1-2 minutes per girl max. You'll be one of the rare normal dudes. If you can't think of anything, just ask them some generic questions you care about.
3. Have a couple back and forth messages with girls
4. Ask them out on a date that is close to where you live. If it has a cafe close by where you can hang out (not bring dates), even better.
5. Of the ones that say yes, about %50 will flake, so you double book date days once you start getting enough replies. Book the times within a hour of each other. Cancel on the worse option if your better option shows up.
6. In a couple weeks, you'll start having a date every day, you'll look forward to flakes so you can have your evenings back.

After a while, you'll be spinning plates and you can get feedback from girls about what stood out about your profile and what was wrong.

This got me results in a place where it's kind of bad.

Remarks on Online Dating - 8ball - 12-06-2012

OD is a waste of time for the most part. But a better thread would have been how to spot girls you meet doing day game or at night venues that are serial online daters. It happened to me more than once, when i had picked up a girl who showed up on a date and told me half way through that she had been doing online dating for years on pof, match and some other site i can't recall atm. Just like it was mentioned above, OD girls are very flaky, feel self entitled and the ones that have been there for a while just want a time filler for an otherwise devoid social circle.

Remarks on Online Dating - Nomad77 - 12-06-2012

I have tried this shit and don't get it. The work to results ratio is insane! Girls I can easily pickup in real-life won't even talk to me online. I can roll out any night and within an hour pickup better looking and more girls than I can online in a month of hard work. The worse part is that you really don't know who will show up when you meet them. Last girl I met had somehow managed to gain a good size belly from the pics she had online. I know this works for some guys but for me it's just not worth it. The girls I have met online I wouldn't even approach in real-life.

Remarks on Online Dating - bojangles - 12-07-2012

Quote: (12-06-2012 07:32 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

I have tried this shit and don't get it. The work to results ratio is insane! Girls I can easily pickup in real-life won't even talk to me online. I can roll out any night and within an hour pickup better looking and more girls than I can online in a month of hard work. The worse part is that you really don't know who will show up when you meet them. Last girl I met had somehow managed to gain a good size belly from the pics she had online. I know this works for some guys but for me it's just not worth it. The girls I have met online I wouldn't even approach in real-life.

I find it's easier just to troll.

MattC on here gets great results, like me, he spends most of his time on there when he's supposed to be working

Remarks on Online Dating - Neo - 12-07-2012

Quote: (12-06-2012 05:47 AM)malc Wrote:  

Meh, online dating is time efficient in big cities, even for men in the end. It's even better when your life is a cockfest and your a workaholic. And as a workaholic you want to get sleep instead of just going out late at night and spending too much money on overpriced beer when you can going rock climbing with your friends and sleeping.

You just treat it like a sales funnel. Some girls on there have lives where it's a lady land like nurses, occupational therapists, elementary school teachers and mostly female friends. Online dating also exposes you to really random groups of people that you might never encounter in your life. Many women never go out to typical night game places or go to malls with any sort of frequency.

After spending a couple of hours on a profile once:

1. Tab out 30 girls your interested in
2. Say hello, ask a couple of questions, only put in 1-2 minutes per girl max. You'll be one of the rare normal dudes. If you can't think of anything, just ask them some generic questions you care about.
3. Have a couple back and forth messages with girls
4. Ask them out on a date that is close to where you live. If it has a cafe close by where you can hang out (not bring dates), even better.
5. Of the ones that say yes, about %50 will flake, so you double book date days once you start getting enough replies. Book the times within a hour of each other. Cancel on the worse option if your better option shows up.
6. In a couple weeks, you'll start having a date every day, you'll look forward to flakes so you can have your evenings back.

After a while, you'll be spinning plates and you can get feedback from girls about what stood out about your profile and what was wrong.

This got me results in a place where it's kind of bad.

^ Good advice.

I go about it the exact same way. I work full time and am starting a side business. I probably work 60+ hours a week. Once the profile is set up, it takes minimal time. It probably takes about 1 minute or less to send a message.

I actually deleted my accounts because I wanted a break. What malc wrote about is exactly what happened to me. Things snowballed and I was meeting up with online girls 3-5 times a week. It got to the point where I just needed time to relax. It was also affecting my workouts and job, because I'd be drinking on weekdays and ending up at these girls places at 1-2 AM on like a weds. I'd walk into work unshowered and probably smelling of pussy. It had to stop, I don't think my coworkers noticed.

There are a lot of girls with attitudes, but as written above there are girls who work in all female professions. These girls are very easy to get into bed.