What are your biggest red flags? - Printable Version

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What are your biggest red flags? - rudeBoy - 07-29-2015

A loud woman is the biggest red flag for me.

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What are your biggest red flags? - PapayaTapper - 07-29-2015

A woman who doesn't laugh easily. This means she doesn't have what I call the "happy gene" and is more prone to moodiness, pouting or being downright depressed. If her natural "state" isn't a positive , upbeat one then that means you have to work to keep her that way.



WB but no LTR

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What are your biggest red flags? - Gixxy - 07-29-2015

Quote: (01-29-2015 02:34 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

From my personal experience (I recently filed for divorce):

- single mom
- broken family background (adopted / or has divorced parents / or endured abuse, etc)
- doesn't get along with her parents
- doesn't have much extended family
- an attitude that is less than "family is the MOST important thing to me"
- has a history of cheating
- has slept with more than 5-10 people
- personality changes when she has more than 3-4 drinks
- is on antidepressants or anxiety medications (peek into her medical cabinet, and if you see an AD, run!)
- is moody or has untreated depression (do you feel melancholy in her company? if so, RUN)
- manipulative, or tries constantly to force her frame on you
- plays the damsel in distress
- is a perfectionist or extremely hard on herself (she will be on you if you stay with her!)
- is a teacher or has a low paying occupation with little future upside (trust me on this one)
- if under an 8, she is the hottest girl in her social circle, and/or has fat friends
- gets along with guys better than she gets along with girls
- has a "Nice Girl" syndrome and uses "covert contracts" (does something nice to someone and expecting something in return)
- your own confidence and self-esteem decreases little by little the more time you spend with her (again, RUN before it gets worse!)
- is a spender (has big eyes when she shops or eats out, tries to live a bigger lifestyle than she can afford)
- uses what you have shared with her previously against you in a shit-test, debate, or argument

Some of these red flags are important only if you are looking for an LTR (like whether she gets along with her parents or has extended family), but there are some of these that are just not worth even a single lay.

My God. What was her name!? I KNOW this girl!

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What are your biggest red flags? - Gixxy - 07-29-2015

Quote: (03-21-2015 01:35 PM)Vaun Wrote:  

Biggest challenge now and biggest frustration, no counter offer;

These are softballs. Smash these!

Quote:Quote:

You: Hey lets meet up this Tuesday at 9 for a drink
Her: We will see, ask me next week, I am out of town this weekend

You: Sorry. I can't do that. I'll be out of town myself. Have a great trip!

Quote:Quote:

You: Are you free on Friday at 10 for a drink?
Her: I am not available that day
Her: silence

You: NEXT!

Quote:Quote:

You: Great, when are you free next week(usually a last resort because it looks needy)
Her: I dont know, I'm pretty busy, can you text me on Tuesday and we will see?

You: Well first, if you're asking more than a week out, you may want to look at that. I have no idea what my social agenda looks like for next week. She definitely won't.
But if you insist...
You: Cool. Talk to you then. And then you have the decision as to whether a re-attempt is worth your time.

Quote:Quote:

Me: Tuesday?
Her: Sorry didn't see this. Perhaps, can we touch base next week. I'm gone this weekend
Me: Just tell me what day and time works for you.

Personally, I'd be more direct.
Try: I have some time Tuesday to get together between X and X. Do you want to meet then? No response? NEXT.

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What are your biggest red flags? - lifeizfunhuh - 07-29-2015

Two more: passive agressive and any kind of plastic surgery except boobs.

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What are your biggest red flags? - storm - 07-29-2015

Quote: (07-29-2015 12:11 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

A woman who doesn't laugh easily. This means she doesn't have what I call the "happy gene" and is more prone to moodiness, pouting or being downright depressed. If her natural "state" isn't a positive , upbeat one then that means you have to work to keep her that way.



WB but no LTR

This lesson works for all people in your life. Negativity is infectious.

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What are your biggest red flags? - PapayaTapper - 07-29-2015

Quote: (07-29-2015 05:47 PM)storm Wrote:  

Quote: (07-29-2015 12:11 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

A woman who doesn't laugh easily. This means she doesn't have what I call the "happy gene" and is more prone to moodiness, pouting or being downright depressed. If her natural "state" isn't a positive , upbeat one then that means you have to work to keep her that way.



WB but no LTR

Negativity is infectious.

Not if you're immune

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What are your biggest red flags? - storm - 07-29-2015

Quote: (07-29-2015 05:59 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

Quote: (07-29-2015 05:47 PM)storm Wrote:  

Quote: (07-29-2015 12:11 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

A woman who doesn't laugh easily. This means she doesn't have what I call the "happy gene" and is more prone to moodiness, pouting or being downright depressed. If her natural "state" isn't a positive , upbeat one then that means you have to work to keep her that way.



WB but no LTR

Negativity is infectious.

Not if you're immune

Ha-ha, sure. How can I learn to be immune?

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What are your biggest red flags? - 2000man - 07-29-2015

Red flags depends on the situation for me.

If I'm out looking for notches then the kinda crazy girl with the emotional problems can sometimes be not only easier to lay, but a tiger in the sack. Fine by me. Along those lines, I agree 100% with the No-Cook, No-Taste chicks. I wouldn't spend any concerted relationship time with them. But in the light of notches, it really wouldn't matter to me.

Dating, Mini-relationship, or LTR, then a lot of the red flags mentioned here that I agree with.

But one that sticks out in my mind, vapeing (vaping).

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What are your biggest red flags? - Brosemite - 07-29-2015

A girl that likes to keep a set of male friends for the sake of validation....but also has attractive female friends....yet never brings the attractive female friends around her male "friends"....

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What are your biggest red flags? - StrengthBySonny - 07-30-2015

Biggest red flag is that she has a lot of guy friends... A lot of times you can't control these girls which can be frustrating.

Again... these types of chicks don't have much shelf life aka low relationship potential.

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What are your biggest red flags? - ordinaryleastsquared - 07-30-2015

Orientation: Straight
Drugs: Never
Religion: Christianity, and very serious about it
Status: Single
Pets: Has cats
Speaks: English

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What are your biggest red flags? - birthday cat - 07-30-2015

Yeah perhaps I'm pessimistic but English being her first language is a red flag for me.

Once I had one date with a girl whose first language wasn’t English but she turned out to be a feminist that went on and on about how smart she was and her graduate school program. I kept quiet while she kept digging herself into a deeper hole and she eventually says “I don’t have a lot of respect for your gender.” I'd say that is a pretty big red flag. She was into me and wanted a 2nd date. WTF some of these girls are thinking is beyond me.

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What are your biggest red flags? - Ingocnito - 07-30-2015

Bitches that talk about the amount of orgasms you gave them after sex. Had one recently I regularly gave 4-7 orgasms every time we fucked. One night recently we got together, both exhausted from the weekday grind, and both came once and passed out briefly. I got the feeling she felt let down and shit's been rocky ever since.

Girls that are bad a sucking dick. As if they only know one single way to do it, and need total direction for every minor aspect of it. Typically they're doing it not because they want to, but because if they put in the time up front, they can go about their sexually selfish ways later down the road.

Granted this is girl game b.s., but girls that are vague about everything, especially responding to simple shit, informational logistics, etc, of getting together. Plan on kicking them to the curb, because that's what they're essentially doing to you.

Weird quirkiness. I appreciate uniqueness, but the quirk is there for a reason. After you've built comfort and it reappears, it's likely rooted in psychopathic means for manipulating people in some evil sense for her benefit and no one else, especially you.

Girls that appear clean, smell clean (including sexually), feel clean when you first meet them, but lead fairly disgusting unclean lives. I.e. Smokes regularly, not just when drinking, and has ashtrays in her bedroom (fing nasty), her toothbrush looks like it's a year old and doesn't properly rinse it after using it, has a dirty bathroom or kitchen (refrigerator is gross inside). Worse yet is they have no qualms about inviting you into experience the gross environment.

Girls that overplay their eye passes. You're talking to them, and they do a lot of eyelash batting, hanging on too long to a gaze into your eyes even after they begin to turn their head away, etc. Every girl I've fucked with who overly accentuated her eye play turned out to be a very shady ass bitch.

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What are your biggest red flags? - Diop - 08-01-2015

Just skimmed through this whole thread and was surprised nobody mentioned this one - bi-sexuality. If a girl says she's bi-sexual then (to me) it indicates a number of negative traits about herself, most prominently selfishness. Case in point - I was on a date with a girl who mentioned being bi, and how her last BF let her screw around with women on the side when she wanted to. I asked if he was allowed to watch, participate, or at least hook up with other women himself since she got to and she answered emphatically that she forbade him to do anything of the sort. When I asked why, her reply - "it's too hurtful to share someone you love with someone else". Uh, hypocrite?

I know some get excited when they hear a girl is bi-sexual since fantasies of threesomes pop into ones head, but to me it sounds like a selfish excuse for your girl to hook up with other people in a LTR while you get no benefit from it. Maybe it's different for some, but to me it's a red flag.

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What are your biggest red flags? - amusedmastery - 08-01-2015

American women... Haha. No, I'm serious.

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What are your biggest red flags? - Vaun - 08-01-2015

looking back on this thread I think red flags serve two main purposes, for each type of relationship we want;

1) for sex - logistics & interest level
2) for relationships - interest level & compatibility

1) for sex is all about logistical & interest level red flags. Planning and meeting up. Spotting the flake ahead. Texting game, reading interest from texts. LMR red flags that indicate true escalation, to uncover a flake. This is more instinctual, and honed over time with experience. And with experience you get less butt hurt over it. And when you are getting good it becomes second nature. It becomes faster. You become faster and think faster, and deduct reasoning in the moment. This is where we should all attain to be. In the hardest situations. I want to uncover that a total pain in the ass ice queen really wants to have sex with me, that night. I want to crack the hardest safe. To get past the initial red flags like hurdles.

2) for relationships - I could care less about this now, but again these red flags get back to interest level & compatibility. I always come back to whether the girl is a "flexible giver." Is she giving you things. Cooking for you, making you comfortable, blow jobs, thoughtful gifts, etc etc. When I was dating my ex she recorded the entire Tour De France for me on VCR tapes, and gave it to me as a surprise gift at the end of the tour. My whole life was bicycling at the time. She was a flexible giver. Flexible as in flexibility when it pertains to you. Will she be flexible with plans, with your life, your passions, work schedule, your requests. Making amends for you, and bending over backward to deal with you. Sometimes now if I am with a girl for a while I will see how far I can take that. Its my own little game but thats my issue. Knowing she will do whatever, whenever, proves to me she really wants me. To the point that you know she is really there for you. I dont care about this now, but for the LTR, its truly essential.

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What are your biggest red flags? - Akula - 08-01-2015

Quote: (07-30-2015 08:38 PM)birthday cat Wrote:  

Yeah perhaps I'm pessimistic but English being her first language is a red flag for me.

Once I had one date with a girl whose first language wasn’t English but she turned out to be a feminist that went on and on about how smart she was and her graduate school program. I kept quiet while she kept digging herself into a deeper hole and she eventually says “I don’t have a lot of respect for your gender.” I'd say that is a pretty big red flag. She was into me and wanted a 2nd date. WTF some of these girls are thinking is beyond me.

Honestly this is far too prevalent with these man-hating women who've been taught to disrespect and hate men via their "women's studies" or whatever bullshit courses they took.

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What are your biggest red flags? - rudeBoy - 08-06-2015

She writes poems.

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What are your biggest red flags? - Pride male - 08-06-2015

Flirts with other guys in your presence.

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What are your biggest red flags? - borjatone - 08-06-2015

* Gets uncomfortable when you display dominant behaviour.
* Calls you out as a player with a dry and cold tone.
* Declares or implies she's better than what she's getting (this may or may not include you).

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What are your biggest red flags? - StrengthBySonny - 08-06-2015

If she has a Rosie the Riveter tattoo...

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What are your biggest red flags? - Rawmeo - 08-07-2015

Asks to see your phone.

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What are your biggest red flags? - PapayaTapper - 08-08-2015

Quote: (07-29-2015 08:36 PM)storm Wrote:  

Quote: (07-29-2015 05:59 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

Quote: (07-29-2015 05:47 PM)storm Wrote:  

Quote: (07-29-2015 12:11 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

A woman who doesn't laugh easily. This means she doesn't have what I call the "happy gene" and is more prone to moodiness, pouting or being downright depressed. If her natural "state" isn't a positive , upbeat one then that means you have to work to keep her that way.



WB but no LTR

Negativity is infectious.

Not if you're immune

Ha-ha, sure. How can I learn to be immune?

In a way I was being facetious but you're right. It's a good idea to keep negative people out of your life as a general rule

For me I long ago made a conscious decision to not let "negativity" in. I figure I have a limited amount of psychic energy and time and I don't want to waste either. Drama, petty bullshit, self destructive people, the news, etc...fuck all that shit.

The world has a lot of terrible shit in it. But it also has a lot of incredibly good shit too. We live in amazing times: information, travel, food, sex, adventure, good friends,...it goes on and on. If you choose to see, feel, learn, ...FOCUS on being drawn to positivies and learn to be repulsed by negativity then you too my friend will be immune to it

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What are your biggest red flags? - Pride male - 08-08-2015

Has been to Dubai.

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